A very wierd Thursday..and an interesting happiness

You ever have one of those days where you feel like you are dreaming? That your body is laying in bed still, and you're just dreaming the entire day? And as you walk through the day, everything weird that COULD happen, does? I'm having that sorta day today.

It all started last night actually, I had the darnest time going to sleep. I busted my butt off yesterday working to clean the house, and I was pretty darned proud of myself. I cleaned all day long (except a few random breaks to blog and stuff) I stopped around 5:30, when I started cooking. I prepared a really good meal, washed dishes, and once Stephen was in the bed, I was exhausted, I just wanted to shower and go lay down with my husband and watch tv and pass out, but once I did all that, I woke up, Jesse had fallen asleep before I did, and even once I turned the tv off I laid there for hours wide awake, plus I was too cold, or too hot. I finally fell asleep about 3am, one hour from which the alarm was set to go off for Jesse to wake up. I *think* I have a vague memory of the alarm going off, but I'm not sure. Usually I wake up with him and end up staying up, or at least set the alarm for a later time to when I need to be getting up to get Stephen up. But I have no memory of any alarm, maybe a fuzzy recollection that I couldn't testify to, so no alarm reset, no wake up. I jerked awake, from a nightmare of all things, at 6:45am. Stephen needed to be at the bus stop by 7:06am. In a fog I get stephen up, get out the door, and get him on the bus safely.

Head back inside, where I don't really remember what I did, I think I got on the computer? I don't know. Shortly after that, I get a knock on my door. It's the septic tank guy. After a few hours of haggling with my landlord, which is a whole other rant, and part of the reason i'm in a uber bad mood that a mop can't fix..he finally leaves.

So I go get on my clean nicely made bed, and pull Stephens huge down comforter I just washed to prepare for the winter on, and settle down to relax with Army Wives, started watching an episode where the main character was just diagnosed with diabetes and has to get insulin shots and everything, and basically has a meltdown over it, and the entire time i'm thinking..lady..its JUST diabetes, seriously! you have a cushy life with a husband who's a bigwig in the army, you haven't had to work a day in your life, you live in a posh house, with anything you want and you're having a meltdown over diabetes? I was just about to push the eject button in disgust when I heard a huge racket out in the living room, and my dog goes shooting out of her comfy spot next to me, and hauls butt out there.

I go out there..and to my complete and utter surprise..I discover something that I don't think too many people discover in their house..scampering under the couch, with my cat diligently stalking it..was...*drum roll*.......

The poor little guy was so terrified. I have no idea when he got in, I'm thinking yesterday when I was cleaning house, because for a few minutes Candy (my pit bull) was staring at the dishwasher in complete fascination. And sniffed it like crazy. (there's a tiny hole next to the bottom of the dishwasher, jesse installed the dishwasher himself, tore out cabinets to put it in, but the size and shape of the washer didn't allow a complete re-installation of the wood without buying more wood and dealing with sizes and fitting and all that other BS that we don't have the money for.
Anyways. So after I saw him run under the couch, I dealt with my cat who wouldn't stop stalking the poor guy, surely to pounce and play with it until it dies a horrible death (my cat is a bird murderer, I wouldn't be surprised if he turned out to be a squirrel murder too). Then I pulled the couch out and snapped a picture, I opened the front door, thinking if I pull the couch out, he would see freedom and run for it. When I went to go drag the couch out further, he dragged himself along with it, so I pushed the couch back, he went with it, after going back and fourth a few times with the couch, he finally scampered out from underneath the couch and curled up next to the lamp. He was so tiny, and so very terrified, shaking and shivering, after sitting there a few minutes, trying to figure out how I was going to save his life. I had all sorts of thoughts going through my head, if I tried to pick him up, would he bite me then I die some savage death of rabies? If I got the broom and sorta shooed him out the door, would I kill him? He was so tiny, just a baby. Screw it, I'm gunna see what he does if I pet him. He let me pet him for a very long time, I tried to calm him down and maybe he'd get up and run out the door, he wanted nothing of the sort, instead, he fell asleep! (see pictures) I pulled the lamp away from him and the poor guy covered his head with his tail. Okay then..what now? There was a clear path between him and the freedom of the outside world, but he was so terrified he didn't want to take it. Shoot I would be too if I had some psychotic cat stalking me with the intent of torturing me, and I was just a tiny thing. Finally, after a few minutes of telling him to run, shoo! I gave up, I picked him up, the poor thing was so scared, carefully carried him outside, across the street, and set him down, where he shot off like a bat outta hell. Yay. I wish him a long and prosperous life, live it wonderfully, have lots of little squirrel kids, and don't run out in front of cars. I told him so too, but I doubt he heard me, he was running as fast as he could to safety..but I wished it anyways.

My happiness of today..saving one of God's creatures from a horrible cruel death. and having the ability to be able to say that once upon a time, I petted and carried a squirrel..I always wanted to do that, but they are fast little creatures and would be hard to catch, plus I was afraid of diseases and rabies and me dying a horrible death just to pet the cutest little thing...but alas, I can check that off my list of things I've always wanted to do.



PS. Does anyone know any good lawyers that deal in a tenants rights? that would offer a free consult? preferably someone in Florida, or who would know a Floridian's rights? Thanks.

Happiness for today

Two posts for today! one negative..one happy..

so my happiness post for today..


and I totally stole this picture from the net as well, cause I wanted to share my happiness but do not have the ability to really post the picture from my own camera, plus I wouldn't really wanna show the world how dusty my fans are:P

These things are the best things ever invented, next to toilet paper, shampoo and Ipods. If you clean your house, you really outta have one of these.. they extend and shorten and the heads rotate both ways, and it really does pick up dust and yucky stuff very easily. My fans get dusty real quick, I have four cats, a chicken, a dog, a kid and a husband. and a lot of times i'm too lazy to drag a chair with me everywhere (I know, I make NO sense, considering I'm busting butt to clean in the first place) and stand on it to scrub the fans every time I clean. This thing even gets the base part of the fan that a lot of people don't really think to clean.

See..its the simple things in life, i'm easy to please=)

Mop Therapy

I've been putting off my post for today, simply because I wanted to try to keep up with the happiness thing. But I may just have to skip a day, because I am just annoyed. I got music blaring in the hopes that if I beebop enough with the mop, I'll wear myself out and get over the annoyed. I'm sure it will work, so far its got my blood pumping (I'm on break, waiting for floors to dry so I can go back over with a mop..we have annoying floors that take a few times to actually get CLEAN, then we have to go over it with a towel just to get the excess murky water off)

The company that finances my car, just changed hands. They went from GMAC to Ally. They should change the name of their company from Ally to Annoying. Imbeciles? Idiots? Allidiots? I swear. Since the change I've been on the phone with them if you average it out, probably 2 times a day. And they cannot get their crap STRAIGHT! it's like, GEEZE. document! If one person calls me to try and set up a payment, document in the little box in front if you called a "computer" and say that I specifically told you that I cannot do it today I have plans to some other time. That way I don't get another call 15 minutes later, by someone else. And NONE of them understand english very well, they are probably posted all over India or something, different servers, different headquarters.

So the other day I got a statement in the mail, how much owed, one of those statements you tear off the top to mail a payment to them. Jesse and I were in dispute last night while we were driving around about how much behind we were (not a serious dispute, I thought it was less he thought it was more) so we decided to call and get it clarified. Before calling today, I got online and viewed my statement there. TOTALLY different amount. okay? So I called the 800 number on the website.. after being transferred to three different departments and extensions, I finally get a (barely) speaking English person named Kiselia (pronounced Keysella). She proceeds to tell me total amount due was about 300+ dollars LESS than the statement and the website. Okay? She insisted that she set up a payment TODAY. Um no, not until I get a throughout explanation of what is owed and what I am paying (fees and whatnot). I tell her I have in my hand a statement from Ally saying this amount is owed. I'm in front of a computer stating that much is owed, and now you are telling me This is owed? WHICH is it? I am not about to loose my car because of the incompetency of you people. She put me on hold like five times, and came back to tell me her amount is right, and its this payment and this fee and thats why it's this. So I say, what about this paper I am holding in my hand saying this is owed? She wanted to know when I received this paper, maybe it wasn't this months statement? Yeah I received it yesterday. On hold again. She comes back on the phone saying their computers aren't showing record that I was sent any form of letter or statement since September. NO CRAP. It was sent 9/28. two days before October, which is the current month. She insisted their records show nothing was sent. I asked what address she has on file to mail payment to, and she told me. So I'm like, okay, well what do I do about this statement, because I so clearly have it showing who it was sent from, the amount due, and who to send money from, which ironically the address to mail payment back to, is the very same address she cleverly recited to me. And lets not forget the website, which is the website address person number 1 that I spoke to, recited back to me when he told me I can view my statement online to find out how much is owed. She tells me disregard both, and to set up her payment with her. I asked her name, her extension, and said if my car goes into repossession because you are telling me to disregard a paper statement, and a online statement, and go with her amount..I know exactly who to call and complain about. So she proceeds to try and get me to set up another payment. No thanks, I'll set it up online, and call back later and speak with someone else. *hangs up*

oh my gawd! seriously? get your friggin facts straight people, because I am NOT about to loose my car because of idiots who can't speak English, and don't have the same database on their computer, because clearly something is not matching up. *IF* I loose my car, its because of my own idiotcy and lack of payments. ARGH! I'm getting worked up again. Lemme go see if I can mop some more.

Favorite time of year

I'm waiting on Stephen to get home, the AC is off, every window and door in the house is open, it's warmer right now because its midday, but at night and in the morning, its beautiful. It's my favorite time of the year. Most people who know me think that Summer or Spring would be, cause that's the time I would usually start hitting the beach or pool, I'm a total wateraholic. But it's not, I love the feeling of the cool breeze, the clean air, snuggling up in bed in the morning, it's the best time of year. The most stressful, but the best. If I could find a picture to post for the Happiness thing, I'd so do it for the fall feeling, but I live in Florida, we have no season changes, the trees stay green all year round.

Today, has been a weird day. I missed the bus. For some reason my alarm didn't go off today, I don't know if I slept through it, or what, because it works, I checked it when I woke up. I woke up at 7:15am, just in time to run into stephens room yelling at him to get dressed, the bus hadn't come yet. by the time we got his clothes on, I was still undressed, and the bus was sitting outside ready to pull off. And so we missed the bus. Total freakout moment for me, because I had NO way of getting Stephen to school. So I ran outside hoping to catch one of the bus mommies, most of them are really nice and probably wouldn't mind giving me a ride, except I missed the bus mommies too. It was a frickin conspiracy. But I was determined. my next course of action was to go to every single door on my street and offer 20 dollars (and hope that they don't accept that offer out of the niceness of their hearts, because I didn't have 20 dollars) if none of them could do it, I was going to walk a few blocks west of my street and ask Super-mommy to help. Super-mommy is what I call one of the bus mommies. She's got a thing for superman, and is always wearing a superman shirt, she has a superman symbol on the back of her truck, she's given me a ride down the road to Kelly's a few times (the local stop and shop down the road, its a bait store that has the normal convenience store type stuff).but I was going to knock on every door in my vicinity first. My first stop was my neighbors house next door. She's totally awesome, sometimes she surprises me by mowing my lawn, cause our lawn mower was stolen ages ago, and we have no way of mowing it. Surprisingly, she agreed to give us a ride. YAY! and she wouldn't take 20 bucks either! score! so Stephen was off to school.

My chicken has taken over my house, right now she moved her egg laying spot to Stephens room. She's kinda taken over Stephens room, if I go and attempt to disturb her as shes preparing herself for her egg laying, she will NOT be happy with me. So my plans for the day WERE to go organize Stephens room. I'm thinking I'll wait until tomorrow. And so now, after I'm done with this, I will go get Stephen, then come back and finish up my coupon cutting, and shopping trip planning.

So, for today, my happiness, is...(and I totally cheated and stole this picture off of some website on the internet, I don't have transportation I can't exactly get there)


CVS is the BEST store around, I swear. They make it annoyingly easy to get free stuff. All you have to do is get one of their little cards (or two or three, if you feel like you can organize your stuff real well) spent a tiny bit of money a week on newspapers, some more time cutting out coupons, reading the sunday flier of ads for CVS, then going to the store. If you plan your shopping trip very carefully, most of the time you can walk away with a profit. They have this wonderful gift called Extra Care Bucks. they have sales weekly if you buy certain things, you get a certain amount of extra carebucks back to use towards your next shopping trip. Most of the time you can find those items have a coupon in the paper, plus CVS loves to have coupons like $5 off of $15 visit or something like that, then you have previous extra care bucks from a previous visit, and you can spend something like .13 cents and walk away with something like 15 dollars in extra care bucks to use towards your next trip. It's the most awesome feeling in the world, knowing that all the shampoo and razors and things that you would normally need to buy, were free!

My Happiness

The past few blogs have mostly been rants. It's probably almost that time of the month, plus the weather sucks. It's everyone elses fault but mine:)

So I decided to post something positive. I had come across a friends blog, and in this blog, she was participating in "The Happiness Project" which she has to post one picture a day of something that makes her happy. I can't do this, because my computer isn't well enough to handle that sort of project, because I'd have to take pictures every day and upload them and save them on the computer then upload them on here. Not possible with my 10 year old piece of trash computer. I have a laptop that is currently totally busted, and it's in serious need of repair, but bills and such come first. ANYWAYS.

I do have a few pictures on my computer, and from the few, I could pick out a few random things that make me happy, so I wanted to post one. I can't fully participate in the Happiness Project, but I can pick out a few random pictures. I'll try to stay away from the obvious things, my son makes me insanely happy, and I could post a goober amount of pictures of him up here, but I wanted to try and capture the small things.


My chicken! Morkie. She's a nut. She has the most awesome personality. And she's completely spoiled. She's managed to totally worm her way into our house and hearts. Some of the things she does makes me laugh even if I'm in the stormiest of moods. She's possessive of us, and bossy, and thinks shes bigger than all of the animals we own. She's more ferocious than our pit bull. She totally thinks of us as her family, she follows us around and insists on sampling every drop of food that we make. She thinks shes a cat/dog/person, doesn't matter..she's Queen B in our house. It tickles me silly if I'm doing laundry and I go from the master bedroom to the garage, and she's just so afraid to let me out of her sight, maybe thinking im going to go eat something? I don't know, but as I'm moving around the house, I can hear her pitty pattering behind me down the hall, hauling butt as fast as she can, its so frickin cute. I can't explain it. Most people think I'm insane for owning a chicken, let alone keeping her in the house, but she's something. You'd have to spend time with her..I hate birds, I fear them, I make wide berth around them, but she's completely won me over.

Small Towns and Public Transportation

My county has a bus, public transportation, I've never had the need to go on it, until recently. In my recent rant and vent yesterday about things I needed (I do feel better by the way) I mentioned a parent/teacher conference, it is this coming Thursday. So for practice I decided to figure out the bus/mass transit system of my county, then maybe go for a short ride today, to get out of the house, and figure the system out.

It's impossible. I went on their website, I figured out their fares, but apparently they require a purchase of some sort of ticket, but all of the places to purchase such a ticket, it seems like are so far away from me. I know the bus USED to come down my road, I'm not sure if it still does, I haven't seen it in a while, and I couldn't locate my tiny town on any sort of routes/schedules. My tiny town manages to have a tiny Post Office, and a tiny Library, why can't we have a bus stop, that's clearly labeled on their website? Other than those two things there is literally nothing in this town, except houses and shacks and boats. It's a fishing type town, we have tons of bait shops and places to go fishing, but no bus stops. The local tourist attraction, or local hangout is the dollar general that just opened up down the road. So basically from my amateur eyes, it looks like I need to hitch a ride with someone to Edgewater, probably around the vicinity of a Publix Supermarket, which happens to be two blocks from Stephens school anyways. From Publix I will probably need to ride the bus all the way down to New Smyrna Beach, getting off at the NSB public library, go inside, purchase some sort of a ticket, get back on the bus and be free to ride around wherever I need to go? or hitch a ride to New Smryna Beach, then get on the bus and head back this way to Edgewater so that I can get off at Publix and go to Stephens school? I don't know. I might have better luck with a thumb and a stranger. I'm probably over-thinking it, if I can figure out how to get into a toy that is kidproofed with knobs and screws and secret codes to open, i'm sure I can figure out mass transit.

One spookier news, I've been on a netflix kick lately, we discovered how to watch instant streams on our Wii. So we set up the Wii in the bedroom, I know I could probably use the 14 dollars a month on better things, like a book, or a haircut, but for a while there my husband would watch TV on the wii, and leave me alone to let me read a book, or at night we'll lay down and watch our usual shows, he's trying to turn me into a Trekkie. We've been watching Star Trek: Voyager. Just finished watching Battlestar Galatica. It's our time spent together, quietly watching tv. We don't have cable. Anyways, so I discovered the joy of laundry folding and TV watching at the same time, and explored the Instant Stream. I'm on a documentary kick (see blog from earlier in the week about "The Cove")

I totally am freaking myself out with things. I've watched everything from National Geographic: Hauntings to 2012: The End of the World. December 21st 2012, (I think that was the date..or December 26th? or 22nd? I don't even remember) we're all going to DIE! oh my gawd! *sigh* If all those fancy scientists on the television are to be trusted, we're going to die in two years. Great. I need to come up with a list of things to do before I die, and do them. I'm going to go sky diving, and scuba diving, and I want to rob a bank (just kidding) and go run down the road naked. Of course I'll probably have to put "Figure out Public Transportation" at the top of the list, otherwise I won't be able to travel to do all those things.

The Small Things..

Sometimes I have a hard time silencing that tiny little voice in my head that sometimes just HAS to be heard. Most moms have it I'm told. The voice that is way deep down in this tiny little box yelling "WHAT ABOUT ME!?!?!" The voice that is usually silenced so that a mom can place her child's needs and her families needs above her own. A few days ago deep down inside me, MY box burst open and out came that voice. I want a few small things, that's all. My needs are relatively simple.

1.) Since I've met my husband, I've had exactly one haircut. The entire time I've known him, he's had several, so has my son, I've had one..ONE. I would like a haircut. Maybe even throw an eyebrow wax in with that, because I look like a hairy monster, I can't find any tweezers, I know where one pair is, and it's in my husbands toolbox, which he uses as a tool, and that one is not getting anywhere near my eyebrows. Not that I have the time to pluck them sometimes, because when I think about it, is usually when I have a 5 year old running around, and his favorite thing to do is hit me in the arm to try and get my attention..he hits hard, and yells MOMMY! tweezers are NOT going near my eyebrow when I'm getting hit in the arm.

2.) I also would like a doctors visit. I haven't been to a regular doctor in a while, and I'm overdue for my OBGYN appointment by several months. My problem I am having right now, I have something in my neck, its swollen about the size of a strawberry, and hurts like heck, and is affecting my hearing, and is giving me these monster headaches and makes me cranky. I'm living on tylenol and IB profuen, when I can get it, because my husband is also prone to taking more than four pills due to headaches (most often caffeine related) And it's affecting my sleep, sometimes the throbbing wakes me up.It's probably something simple, like a swollen lymph node, however sometimes when the pain is particularly bad, my imagination runs wild and I imagine I'm seconds away from an exploding tumor or something. Either way, it'd be nice to get this thing looked at and possibly some kinda of treatment started, and I don't feel like it warrants a ER visit, besides, how would I get to the ER? I'm NOT calling a ambulance.

3.) I would like a bike. Our family has one method of transportation. My car. Fortunately for my husband he has a job, he has to drive to Daytona every day, from 5:00am to about 5:30pm every day. Unfortunately for me, that leaves me with no transportation. I could use the exercise of walking down to the store if I need something, but it's been raining every single day the past few weeks, and I don't really feel like getting drenched for something like milk. I need a bike. preferably by the 7th of October. I have a parent/teacher meeting with my sons teacher at 3:30pm, and it's not looking like its going to get rescheduled, so I need to somehow find a way down there, and it's looking like I need a bike so I can cycle myself down there. Maybe if I leave early in the morning I can make it there by the time school gets out. I remember days when I was younger and I rode a bike from Holly Hill to beyond Port Orange with my friends, I think I can handle 5-10 miles from here to Stephens school.

4.) I want a book. I want to go to this brand new used book store that opened up down the road. Instead of my husband spending 2.99 on some energy drink, I want to take that 2.99 and go to the used book store, and browse (kid less preferably, so I can take my time) and pick out a book, hand over money and walk out of the store with my purchase. It's been a very very long time since I've bought something for myself. Usually I'm buying toys for Stephen, or school supplies, or food for Stephen. If I am not buying for Stephen, I'm buying for Jesse, cigarettes, energy drinks, prescriptions, doctors appointments, meetings, drivers licensee things, etcetc. all of the hundreds of thousands of dollars we've spent on Jesse's things, and Stephens things the past 14 months, just once I'd like to walk in the store and buy a book. I'm not saying that I haven't spent money on things like Dr. Pepper or a box of Publix cookies, or whatever for myself, but I can't remember the last time I went to the store with money, with myself in mind, for something superficial like a book.

That's it. That's all I need.

I lied..

5.) I need sleep. I need one day of pure, uninterrupted sleep, from whatever time I go to bed, until whenever my eyes open. I want sleep, I want to be my husband right now. It's 10:32am and he's asleep, I've been up since 8am, when Stephen stuck hand on my arm and started slapping me. Then after that my chicken hopped on the bed and started squawking in my ear. yesterday I woke up at 7:45am. every day before that I woke up at 4:06am (when my alarm goes off, to get my husband up) and I don't get to go back to sleep. Once that stupid alarm goes off, I'm up, once my kid starts slapping me on the arm, I'm up. I want ONE day of no interruptions, I want to sleep in.

Probably number 5 is the main reason I'm whining about the things I want. Maybe if I got more than a couple of hours of sleep, and I slept deeply and all night, until a time when my eyes decided to open on their own, it would be SO much easier to silence the tiny voice, and stuff it back in the box deep down inside me, and quit sounding like a whining brat, which during a particularly nasty fight about all of these things above last night, my husband called me childish and ridiculous, because I don't feel like talking about all of this out loud, so I like to just sulk and watch TV and try to get over the funk, when all he wants to do is talk about it, which one part of me knows it, because heaven forbid I want something for myself, and when I realize it, I don't want to talk about it, because I just plain whine and sound like a baby.

Ok, I am tired, I have a headache, my kid doesn't wanna do something like watch TV so I can doze, he wants to stand next to me and slap my arm silly, my husbands asleep, and I'm not in a good mood, so I am going to go ahead and sign off, and hopefully be in a better mood later.